A Peek Inside - What's hard wired?

Things I’ve always wanted to be:
• A writer
• Easygoing
• Good-natured
• Self-sufficient
• Notably smart
• Focused
• Risk-taker – as in seize the day and follow your dreams!
• Patient
• Recognized
• Organized
• Careful and considered
• Neat freak(ish)
• Independent
• Undemanding
• 5’5”
• Able to say no when I don’t want to do something
• Thin (very un-feminist)
• Engaged (not to be married)
• Spontaneously generous
• Desirable
• Perfectionistic
• Able to eat whatever I want
• Able to love myself as I am *
• Prone to solitude

The things I am:
• A writer (finally!!)
• Intense (“like water off a duck’s back” – rarely words associated with me)
• Easygoing (about things like germs - don’t carry antibacterial gel, subscribe to the 20 second eat it-off-the-ground rule)
• Messy (fold it, hang it, shred it or file it – why bother when I can create mountainous piles that require scaling? – see easily overwhelmed)
• Smart (hmm?)
• 5’2”
• Likely to say maybe when I mean no
• Risk-adverse (better safe than sorry as opposed to seize the day)
• Inclined to follow someone else’s dream
• Funny
• Periodically frantic
• Stuck in old patterns (see messy, disorganized, dependent)
• Sporadically engaged (see inconsistent and references to A.D.D.)
• Intermittently cranky (see messy, overwhelmed, and disorganized for underlying causes)
• Easily overwhelmed (see messy, disorganized, intense, needy)
• Disorganized (but open to being organized by others)
• Demanding (at least that’s what I’m told by some who know me well but I don’t always believe it)
• Dependent (because it’s easier NOT because I can’t do stuff)
• Distracted (see references to A.D.D. – I love a medical excuse)
• Imperfectionist (completion-phobic?)
• Needy (not in a scary way, just in a constant, low grade, hard to miss way - out of habit not need – see dependent)
• Whiny (also habitual – whining can pass for action)
• Giving (not always without expectation)
• Inconsistent (consciously so - unlike my dad)
• Prone to company

*Note: the list may contain contradictions


I didn't know you were only 5'2". Try going metric - it sounds so much bigger.


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